Top Ten Helpful Tips on Filing Taxes

Paperwork Frustration

10. It is advisable to file taxes most every year.

9. Illegal aliens need not file.

8. Visits with prostitutes are no longer tax deductible.

7. Income from extortion need not be reported.

6. A phony Social Security number is all that stands between a plant and a deduction.

5. Avoid checking the "please audit me" box.

4. Embezzled funds may be safely hidden in Swiss bank accounts.

3. Mafia hits may be claimed as business expenses.

2. Make bribe checks out to "Cash."

1. When all else fails, flirt with your auditor.